Tag / style

By On In Style463 Comments

First of all, excuse the recent absence. Since the big move into our new house, I have been focusing on many things except blogging. Such as our interior which is really coming together, this is the main reason why I haven’t had time to blog, you guys know I like to take my time picking the right paint color, choosing a rug and all the decoration.

We are still on the hunt for a new couch that will go well with our mid-century interior. We are leaning towards this one (which looks a lot nicer in real life). Other than that I started my new job with a much longer commute than before, picked up reading again and kept myself busy with a home garden with all kinds of vegetables. So that left little time for the internet.

Which is fine because the internet, or to be more specific Instagram, Tumblr and Pinterest were putting me down the past couple of weeks. I’m actually a pretty confident person 99,9% of the time but for some reason the never ending stream of imagery of beautiful tall and thin women started to get to me. I wasn’t in a good place at the time due to our move and my new job which was very stressful so that may have been the reason. But I knew I needed a time-out when suddenly terms as ‘elegant’ and ‘effortless’ became equivalents to ‘tall’ and ‘thin’ and I reasoned that certain outfits (like the ones above) would have looked amazing on me if only I had that body.

When I went shopping, my expectations didn’t live up to reality. No matter how many different pairs of vintage Levi’s 501 jeans I tried on, they never made me magically look like the next Jeanne Damas or Adenorah. And that’s okay. But it did leave me a bit disappointed. Because I love searching the internet for style inspiration but I do feel that there is a lack of images on platforms such as Instagram or Pinterest that reflect diversity and reality. Although that might depend on your personal style of course. Maybe I’m just not looking in the right direction and that whole French je-ne-sais-quoi aesthetic just isn’t meant for me (more specifically: my body type). But still, it would be nice to find images that cater to your personal style that you can relate to.

Nevertheless, looking back, I’m quite surprised that I, as an adult woman, can be influenced in such a negative way by something as Instagram which I rarely use myself nowadays because I grew tired of trying to maintain my followers after a while (I work in an office four days a week and don’t get home until 7pm. Not a very exciting lifestyle, haha). But I’m not an exception. According to recent British research, Instagram is the most harmful social media network for the mental health of people between 14 and 24 years old. Our feeds filled with photo perfect moments and uber stylish individuals often don’t match with our daily lives and can contribute to social health problems such as depression and a negative body image, which could lead people to more serious issues as criminal conduct and and ending up needing a lawyer for this that you can even get online, you can get redirected here to the right site for this.

What worked for me was to stay away from social media for a while and focus on other things that bring me joy and put everything back into perspective. It was such a relief to get rid of that constant stream of information and to live in the here and now and focus on yourself and the people around you (or your garden hehe) instead of comparing yourself to others and focus on what it is that you don’t have. I’m sure this is all old news to you guys but I just felt the need to share my thoughts, or rather my insecurities, on this subject and tell you that sometimes it’s not so bad to take a step back. Oh and in case you’re wondering, I’m not going anywhere and I will still be blogging.

Does social media ever influence the way you feel about / or look at yourself?

on style and self-possession
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“If you strip away the stereotypes and contradictions about her, one of the fundamental qualities associated with the French girl is her sense of self-possession. She is entirely, unequivocally self-contained. She is focused on living her full life, following her own agenda and cultivating her actual self, rather than reinventing herself or pining away to be someone she’s not. Throughout her life, she invests herself in learning and experiencing, not to change who she is, but to become more fundamentally and more fully who she truly is.”

Entre Nous: A Woman’s Guide To Finding Her Inner French Girl

To be honest, I’m completely over those French girl stereotypes but when reading the excerpt above, it reminded me of Archana’s comment on my 5 piece French wardrobe overview post and more specifically the fact that I decided to wear a black jumpsuit instead of a white dress for my wedding: “But I cant help admire the ones who do what they desire.” This has always been something I take pride in: I refuse to give in to the pressure to be someone that I am not. Not only when it comes to style but also in everyday life. From a very young age I knew that it is impossible for everyone to like you and your actions or beliefs. So you might as well just be yourself, follow your own path and surround yourself with people who like and love you for who you truly are.

Style-wise I try to stay away from trends unless they fit my own individual style which is simple and fuss-free. As much as I would like to experiment at times, in the end I usually go back to my trusted uniform; jeans, a simple t-shirt / sweater and sneakers or ankle boots. Which is fine because I aim to build a wardrobe that is functional, timeless and a reflection of my personality. I know that some people consider this blog too intense in terms of shopping, planning etc. but I don’t think there is anything wrong with wanting to dissect your personal style and preferences. The better you get to know yourself, the easier it is to get dressed in the morning and to feel put together, which leaves more time for the things that are truly important in life.

Image: Knobbly Studio x Laurie Franck

the new garconne
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I spent a large part of my youth reading whatever I could get my hands on. I used to visit the library every single week, borrowing several books at a time. Unfortunately the pressure of reading many, many books in high school and university somewhat killed the pleasure of reading for me. Along with this fast paced world we are currently living in, I can hardly find the time to rediscover my love for books. However, occasionally I’ll pick up a style related book for some light reading such as The New Garconne – How to be a Modern Gentlewoman.

The book by Navaz Batliwalla celebrates fashion’s gentlewomen. Inspiring, independent and relatable women with a penchant for classic styles and a more reflective way of shopping such a La Garçonne founder Kris Kim and perfumer Lyn Harris. A nice change from the usual well-known fashion suspects. Apart from the interviews you’ll also come across an enjoyable essay on the evolution of the gentlewoman, a section on the classic items that every Gentlewoman most likely has in her closet and a shopping guide which not only focusses on designer brands but also more attainable high street brands such as COS.

I definitely don’t consider this the ‘perfect’ style-guide but is there really such a thing? What I like about it is that it’s not another book that dictates you what to buy. Instead, the profiles of these fairly unknown, modern women leave you inspired and make you rethink your own wardrobe. The imagery is lovely and the design is very reminiscent of the Gentlewoman magazine. The only negative thing I can think of is that I got through it rather quickly and would have loved to read more on the subject. This book would make a great gift for the upcoming holiday season or just as a gift to yourself.

On an entirely different note, I’ll be in London the next three days for work and tomorrow (Monday) I’ll be exploring the city on my own before my colleague joins me on Tuesday. I don’t know if this blog has any visitors from London but if someone would like to meet up for drinks, a wine and an Oddbins wine quiz after, send me a message or leave a comment!

2016 style resolutions
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Better late than never, right? I almost finished this post a couple of days ago actually but then I had a momentary America’s Next Topmodel make-over breakdown because my hairdresser decided to cut my hair extremely short without my permission. So for the next few weeks I’ll be walking around looking like a Beatles member. But I do have to say: my new straight fringe looks really nice. So let’s forget about the hair drama and move on to more pressing matters such as my style resolutions for this year.

1) Be more conscious
Did you know that fast fashion ranks second in the worldwide production of pollution, behind big oil? Even though a lot of people seem to become more aware of the impact of fast fashion on the world through documentaries such as The True Cost and Sweat Shop, it hasn’t slowed down. In fact, H&M opened over 200 stores last fall alone. This year I plan on buying even less from stores such as H&M, Zara etc. which is going to be hard now that I have discovered & Other Stories but it feels like the right thing to do.

2) Spend/focus more on basics
Over the years I’ve bought so many basic t-shirts but the ones that are still with me today after countless times of wear are my two Isabel Marant t-shirts. Expensive yes, but worth the money. So this year I would like to invest more in quality basics. Especially jeans and t-shirts as I find myself reaching for these items on a daily basis.

3) Step out of my comfort zone and stop taking the easy way out.
In hindsight, I played it extremely safe last year as you can probably tell from my previous post. Lots of basic garments in black, grey and white. This year I would like to add a few statement pieces. Additionally, I need to stop wearing my sneakers on a daily basis and start enjoying the other shoes that I already own more often. Otherwise I might as well sell them.

4) Rethink the 5 piece wardrobe system.
This way of shopping has taught me a lot the past couple of years but it has occasionally become an excuse to buy things I didn’t need just because I was allowed to purchase five things every season. It’s a great way to start changing your consumerist habits but at this very moment there’s no point in adding a lot of new pieces. So I might change the rules a little along the way this year.

What are your shopping/style resolutions for this year?